Monday, June 29, 2009

I'm working on it

I have a new beginnings kind of feeling. Not sure why. I've been evaluating and reevaluating. Planning and prioritizing.

Here are a few things I want to work on.

I want to be present. I observed this in Nancy Rue at Glen Eyrie. When she is talking to someone, she is with them. She is completely engaged with that person. When it was me, I knew I had all of her attention and that she really heard me.
I'm pretty sure that people don't feel that way when they talk to me. I know that my eyes wander and often my thoughts do too. I tend to think about what wisdom I can share, what I will contribute to the conversation, rather than listening.

I want to have a more teachable spirit. I love to learn, but I hate to be wrong. These two often collide. I've been working on this one for a while. Again, I need to listen. I need to stop thinking about "when can I tell you what I know, because I know ever so much, and you will be so glad to hear what I know and be changed forever." Ugh.

I want to simplify. In lots of areas and lots of ways. Prioritize better. Learn how to manage my energy.

I'm still working on lots of old stuff, too. Like, wondering why I have to always be working on stuff. Does everyone else try this hard? Or is it perfectionism driving me?
See, I need to work on over-thinking, too.


  1. I don't think it's perfectionism at work. One of the things I like about my WFTJ peeps is that they are diligent with introspection and inviting the Lord to change them. Most people don't. They just follow life, putting out fires. I believe God calls us to introspection in His presence, and true humility asks God to change us at a deep level. This is a good thing, Kay.

  2. I think introspection is painful and difficult. I think you are stiving for good things--things God must be putting on your heart.

  3. Kay, you go girl! Working on yourself is wonderful if it's what God wants you to do. It's a good recipe - a heaping cup of goals with a few tablespoons of grace!
    Mix it up and you've got my fabulous friend Kay!

  4. Over-Thinker? No way. Yes, way. There are a couple of those in our family, but I don't know if any of us are as deep and introspective as you are. I am constantly trying to remodel myself into what I believe the world expects me to be. It really hasn't worked very well, yet. I am still me, me, me.

  5. You said... "I need to stop thinking about 'when can I tell you what I know, because I know ever so much, and you will be so glad to hear what I know and be changed forever.' " ...and I had to laugh out loud.

    Since when have you started reading my journal? I think your entire post could have been written in my hand, if I had thought of it first.

    I think if you go back to point one - being know that God will reveal what needs changing, if anything. Most of all, I'm learning he just wants me to be present with him.

    Oh look, there I go, telling you what I know...

    In the journey with you,

  6. Thanks for the reminder to "be there" when we're talking to someone. My fault is waiting for that lull so I can jump in with my pearls of wisdom. Not the best way to treat a conversation.

  7. Great post Kay. I have a hard time with slowing down and staying in the moment too.

    I've spent more time of Facebook and Twitter than blogging. Haven't visited blogs in weeks- maybe a month. Anyway, just popping in to say, "Happy Independence Day!"


I love to hear your thoughts!