Tuesday, July 7, 2009

why do I do that?

I posted a while back on saying no and this post is similar, I guess.

Since being diagnosed with Chronic Epstein Barr, I've been very attuned to my energy expenditure and stress levels. If I can keep these things under control, I lesson my chances of triggering a flair-up.

So, I'm looking at things that I do, or don't do, and thinking about:
does this take energy?
does this give energy?
why do I do it?
is this necessary?
do I enjoy it?

I've discovered that even though cleaning house takes a lot of energy, I think that having a dirty house takes even more. So it's a good trade off. Extend some energy to clean, but gain energy and decrease stress by having a clean environment. That's my theory anyway. I'm still working on putting it into action. It's still hard to dredge up that initial motivation to do the thing.

Blogging takes a bit of energy. I do it because I enjoy it.

Homeschooling takes a lot of energy. I do it because it is necessary.

Writing uses up a lot of energy, but I do it because God wants me to. Also, I think that worrying about how I should be writing and feeling guilty for not writing zaps more energy than doing the work.

I think that's true for most of these situations. Guilt and self-flagellation are very energy intensive.

So, I quit Twitter. A lot of people love it. I didn't. And so, why do it? I did it because it is the thing that you are supposed to do if you are a writer. That's not a good enough reason for me.

I am going to quit writing my Examiner articles. I have been doing it because it is a good opportunity for a writer to get her name out there. I don't enjoy it, though. I don't get any money. I don't get enough pay-off to be worth the energy it requires.

What gives me energy?
Spending fun, non-whining time with my family.
Having lunch with a friend.
Spending time with God.
Being alone.
Good church.
Praise and worship.
Reading a good book.
Hanging out with my writing buddies.
Socializing on Facebook.
Talking to a friend on the phone.
Being in the mountains.
Cool weather.
A haircut.
A day at the spa.
A maid.
A night alone at a hotel.
A trip to England...


  1. Okay, so I'd like to invite you to a spa weekend in the Canadian Rockies so we can laugh and have lunch, get our haircut, talk about writing, talk to God and enjoy my church the next day.

    Oh, Kay, you wrote that post today for me. Thanks for paying attention to Him.

  2. Kay,
    First, I didn't realize that you had recieved that diagnosis. I am sorry. But, I appreciate your sttitude. I can fully relate to your post and was happy to see it explained in words. I'd like my husband to read it. I struggle with my energy as well because of fibro. It is a constant battle to find balance. I waste so much energy stressing out over the messes - it does take as much energy as cleaning.

  3. I'm afraid I have very little energy, and I don't even have a serious diagnosis. Maybe the diagnosis should be: lazy, unmotivated, no desire, bad habits. Maybe all of these together do form a serious diagnosis! I think if I could just leave my body behind, it would be much easier.

  4. Glad to hear you are taking this inventory and making decisions. Otherwise, life takes over and you end up in a place you don't want to be.

    Also, SO GLAD time with friends is something you are keeping. :)

  5. Your litmus test for activities gives me some good ideas for figuring out my priorities. Hmmm. I need to apply that dirty vs. clean test to my desk. The mess is why I write on a laptop on the dining table.

    Thanks for the insight.

  6. Way to set those boundaries Kay! It is so important to know your limitations and spend energy on what is important. Good job.

    So sorry to hear about your diagnoses. I hope you'll get some relief.


I love to hear your thoughts!