I grew up with animals. That sounds weird.
What I mean is, we always had animals around--pets.
We had dogs, cats, chickens, a pony, a rabbit, a duck, maybe others.
I always has such a soft spot for them and would bawl my eyes out over animals being hurt, sick, or killed.
I've hardened. It's odd. We just watched Marley and Me and I only cried a little. I've grown very pragmatic about all that and I feel sad about it. Sad because that part of me is missing and I don't know why or where it went. It makes me feel like I'm mean.
I like animals. I enjoy them. I think they know God. I think they are amazing.
I still miss my kitty that died almost 20 years ago. I understand when people grieve them, so don't get me wrong. But the emotional aspect has changed.
On the other hand, I used to watch the news cold-heartedly. I was never moved by appeals to feed the children or news of genocide.
Now, those are the things that bring the tears. I read the headlines every day and feel my heart crumble a little more.
People in slavery. Fathers who sell their daughters to feed the rest of the family. Children accused of witchcraft. I can't imagine now how I used to be unmoved by these things that wreck me now. I can't even type it without tears.
Maybe my heart only has so much room. Maybe I only have a certain amount of love to give. Maybe for me it's an "either/or" situation. I know people who have both, a deep compassion for animals and for people.
For some reason, for me, it seems it had to be a trade off. I guess that's ok.