Monday, November 17, 2008

get over it

My friend Robbie posted about the pressures of the holidays on her blog, Joy Dance.  So go read it; it's really good!
Just so you know, I am not copying her.  I didn't steal the idea from her.  We happen to be thinking along the same lines because we went together to hear a lady talk about simplifying the holidays.  Turns out, if I did all the things the lady suggested, I would have the most complicated holidays of my life!
Side note: don't be offended that I'm saying holidays instead of Christmas.  It is because I am referring to the holidays, not just Christmas.

The lady talked about entertaining in general, and hospitality -- the fact that you can be hospitable without ever having anyone in your home.  That was a nice thought.  Take dinner to a neighbor who's having a rough time.  Or send them some grocery gift cards.  That counts as hospitality!

I would like to share some lessons I am learning in these areas.

~ Get over yourself.  The lady (I'm sorry, I don't remember her name) said this too.  When you have people over, it's supposed to be about them, not you.  We, Ok - I, worry so much about how clean my house is and how the food will be -must make everything from scratch- and how gorgeous the decorations are.  Why?  Well, honestly - so I can hear how wonderful my house looks, how awesome the food is, how gorgeous the decorations are, etc.  
As another lady put it once, "Strive to bless, not impress."  That really stuck with me.  I've been in homes where the goal is to impress and well... it's just not that comfortable.  So, I repeat that little mantra now every time I am expecting anyone in my home.

~ Get over your house.  All of us have houses that pale in comparison to someone else's house.  Maybe you live in the best house among your group.  Great!  But most of us have a least one friend who has a bigger house, better countertops, nicer floors, better views, fancier stove, prettier faucets...something. Get over it.  Really.  Even the most shallow people aren't going to dump you as a friend because of your house!!  It's easy for us, especially women, to feel like people are judging us based on our home.  But I don't judge others when I go to their houses.  Do you?  I think most people don't.  The lady kept saying that people will just be thrilled that the event isn't at their house!

I'm going to do the rest tomorrow.  So stay tuned!


  1. You're right. I don't judge other when I'm at their house, especially since they were thoughtful enough to include me.

    I love Christmas, and I have become the heir to many sentimental family decorations from my mom and my aunties, so I can't not display them. As a result, my house looks like the house that Christmas threw up on. LOL. But that's okay. It's fun for me. Decorating at Christmas is like visiting with loving ghosts from my past.

  2. Ha! Megan, I should post this line to the ACFW loop for the topic of the week!

    "my house looks like the house that Christmas threw up on."

  3. My house looks like the house everyone threw up on! I don't decorate much any more. A wreath or two, a wall hanging, that's about all. If a person likes to decorate and it happens to impress their company, so what! Do it and enjoy it. Personally I'll be disappointed if everything isn't perfect, Kay. You know me :)

  4. I like coming to your house for Thanksgiving and Christmas because I love you and your family. Being with family and friends is the best, and enjoying good food is great. About decorating, a litte is okay, but to me it is a waste of time and how many people even care?

  5. I am looking forward to coming to your house for Thanksgiving. Very soon.

  6. Kay, loved your post! Let's get over ourselves together this year! :0)

  7. Love that saying, "Strive to bless, not impress." Wonderful post. I am belting out a hearty amen.

  8. Truth here! I love to decorate...but find that I can over do it and stress myself out. I am learning to chill out!! :)


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