happy mother's day

To those of you who have birthed your own.

To those of you who love children birthed by another.

To those of you who have no children but help in mothering other's by stepping into the gap, offering your time, your advice and your love.  

All women have a life-giving spirit.  We nurture and love and give life, whether physical or spiritual.  

Happy Mother's Day to you all!

Keep reading for a post about my mom.

being my mother's daughter

Meant spending about half of my childhood in nursing homes.  Every Sunday we had a service in a nursing home and my sister and I had to go from room to room inviting people to attend and helping them to the service... by ourselves!!

The only Christmas parties I can remember attending were those at school and those at nursing homes.

My mom later worked in a nursing home and that's where we went after school until she got off work.  We have oh so many stories to tell about that.

We picked up people from the nursing home and gave them a ride to church in our car.  Mr. Cooper, Gracie - maybe, And Galen who had Down's Syndrome.

Later mom was in charge of a whole big bus with a lift on it that we used to take all kinds of people to church.  And I mean all kinds.

At the time, I so much disliked all of this.  I really did.  But I didn't have much say in it.

My mother also made us go to church.  Even on Sunday nights when Little House on the Prairie or Wonderful World of Disney was on.  We could have stayed home with dad, but no... we had to go sit through a sermon instead.  One of those nights when I was nine, I accepted Jesus as my savior.

So, when I went to college I had to have a "Christian Service."  I actually had more than I needed to, because I am my mother's daughter.  One of those...working on the bus with a lift that picked up all kinds of people at nursing homes and the local mental health home and taking them to Sunday School.  

I go to church now because I want to.

I know how to be compassionate toward people who aren't like me.  I know how to talk to someone who may have a mental illness or have Alzheimer's.

I won't even take the time to talk about all the animals my mom rescued.  But when I see a stray dog, or horse, or donkey,  I know what to do.

My mom, the defender of the weak and misunderstood.  Lover of the odd and displaced.  She doesn't believe that anyone is too old, too sick, or too mentally incapacitated for the Grace of God to reach.  People have come to know Christ through her ministry whom no one else would even think to talk to.  

Sometimes I see my mother in myself.  That goes for the good and the bad, but I wouldn't want to be any other way.

more randomness

Springtime in Colorado means asking,"Is that a pear blossom or a snowflake floating in the air?"

My mom and I met for lunch then sat for an hour in her van doing nothing.  Talked a little and yawned a lot, but nothing else.  Definitely not type A.

What is beyond the farthest star do you think?  God knows.  That may go in my next book.

On my 30 minute drive between here and another town, I pass shaggy scottish cattle, llamas, sheep, regular cattle, buffalo, and horses.  Many of which have young'uns right now.  

I'm thinking I may start pronouncing every letter in a word.  You know like the word know.  Or knight or knickknack.  O what about the word what?    I don't want to exclude any of the letters.  Exclusion hurts.

i'm ok, you're ok -- or not

I think it is important for me to know why I always have to be ok.  Why I feel like I have to be strong.  Part of it is cultural, I suppose.  And I certainly don't want to be that person who falls apart at every little bump in the road.  You know the one who always has a tragedy going on.  That person who is Never Alright.

But, all along I have been thinking that I am alright.  Not that I was only pretending to be, but that I truly was ok.  But it has come to my attention that I'm not really.  Why is that so hard, even at this moment, to admit?

Someone told me once that I am a strong woman.  That is a compliment that I cherish.  I loved hearing that.  But here's the thing - what is made perfect in my strength?  Anything?

What is made perfect in my weakness?  God's strength is made perfect in my weakness.  It is complete and perfect to cover all of the gaps and holes of my weakness.

But do I want to hear someone say, "I can see that you are weak, but in that weakness, I see God's strength in a way I never have."?  Can I be that humble???

I think I have thought I was ok, because being ok shows God's grace and how He has carried me and made everything ok.  Sheila Walsh once fell apart on live TV when she coanchored the 700 club.  She was deeply depressed and had been ''being alright" because it was the way a Christian should be.  But she said later, "God does not need  a PR rep."  It's not up to me to be sure that God looks good all the time.  Did He say anything about how our being ok brings Him glory?

He did say that He is strong in our weakness.  He is our defender, shield, protector, deliverer, He tucks us under His wing.  None of that sounds like something a person who has it all together would need.

I don't think I need to tell the world all of my problems and weep and wail to anyone I can get to listen.  But with the select few friends I have that I have an open and trusting relationship with, I need to be able to talk about the times I'm not ok.  Just say so.  And maybe even tell them why.

I don't have to be OK all the time.  Neither do you.

thursday thirteen

Random is the new word, you know.  My daughter and her friends say it a lot.  The baggers and checkers at the grocery store say it, too.  So, my TT for today is just random.

1. I'm feeling just a little bit homesick for my old town and my old friends.

2. I am more than ready for all four of us to feel healthy and happy at the same time.

3. My son will only have a little more than one month of summer vacation.  He returns to school the second week of July.

4. I've decided to change the beginning of my book.  I think it will make more sense logistically.

5. One of my kids frequently overdramatizes illness.  The other one not so much.

6. I was told that when I use the word "dude" it makes me seem like one of those people who isn't cool, but is trying to seem cool.  Whatever, dude.

7. I'm so so so tired of people being sick!

8. I get to hear the lovely Meadowlarks all the time here at my house.  Click the play audio button to hear it.

9. Last week was such a lovely week.  I felt all sunshiny and glowy.  But, dude, not so much this week.

10. I'm going to think happy thoughts all day.  Really.  I am.

11. I'm a little bit addicted to Star Trek Voyager reruns.

12. Dude.  One of my kids keeps whining.  *Happy thoughts happy thoughts*

13. There is a person on the trail behind my house just standing there taking in the glorious beauty of this morning.  It is a gloriously beautiful morning.

being nice

It's raining!  I love the rain!

How often do you think something nice about someone, or maybe you even say something nice, but to someone other than the person it's about?

I tend to do it a lot.  

But I have been trying to make an effort to actually tell people the nice things that I think about them.  Why is it difficult to do that?  Is it because people often have an awkward reaction to compliments.  We don't want to make them feel uncomfortable -- which will make us feel uncomfortable? 

But we've all been on the receiving end and even those compliments that make us feel weird, make us feel really good, too.  There are words people have spoken to me that I take out and savor from time to time.  Things said years ago, even.  We all want to hear them, even if we don't know how to respond.

So, if I think someone is pretty, I want to tell them.  If I think someone is wise, I want to tell them.  It is hard for me, but it shouldn't be.  That's just silly.  I'm sure the devil knows the power that kind words have and he has done his best to deceive us into keeping them to ourselves.

*edited to add* We have to make sure that our praise and kind words are true.  If we just say nice things, that is flattery and that is deceitful.  True compliments have to be true.

ack

Oh, tooo cute!  Tooo cute!

Go look at deese itty bitty tutsy wootsy wittle fings!