Saturday, April 28, 2012

A Letter to my Body

Thank you, Body, for growing up healthy and strong. You got tall a bit early and that caused me a little grief but also helped mold my character.

There were times I didn't approve of you. I didn't like how big your feet were and how difficult it was to find jeans. I didn't like the timbre of your voice or the quality of your skin.

I've never managed to control you gracefully but perhaps, like me, you don't like being controlled.

I've come to accept your flaws. The skin still frustrates me, but then, no body's perfect.

Thank you for carrying the children. For nourishing them with your own resources. For protecting them while they formed. I will not berate you for any saggy, line-marked mementos of those days.
We needed a little help, but together we managed to deliver them safely into this world. Thank you for your amazing strength in that endeavor.
Thank you for continuing to nourish them and sharing your antibodies with them. Again, I will not berate you for the mementos.

You've let me down a few times over the years, but who's to say those instances weren't caused by my own choices. I've let you down far more often.

You've served me faithfully and well. I can't speak so highly of my own part. Forgive my negligence and abuse.

We've been through everything together, my constant companion. We have more adventures in store. Though we'll never be what we once were, nothing says we can't be something better.

Thank you. I love you.

Tuesday, April 17, 2012

No Quick Fix

Once, several years ago, I fell into a clinical depression. It lasted two miserable years.
After it went away when I would start feeling a little down and bluesy I would panic. No, no, no, no, no. I don't want to go back there. 
But it's like I heard God say, "Just hold on to me and we'll ride it out."

We live in a quick fix world. 
Hungry? Stick some popcorn in the microwave.
Tired? Drink some coffee.
Headache? Take a pill.
Bored? Get on Facebook.

There's an answer, a formula, a quick fix for everything.
Or so we think.

Truth is, most quick fixes don't fix anything. 
Eating a snack may not satisfy the nutritional needs that underlie your hunger.
Coffee isn't going to help you the way a good nights sleep will.
Taking a pill doesn't address the reason why you get headaches in the first place.

Most real fixes require time. And we don't like to wait.
One time I was reading about when Abraham had some angels come and visit. He offered them lunch and the meal began with him asking a servant to go out and kill the best calf.
That was no fast food. These days we barely even want to wait around for water to boil.

A while back I was having a really bad mood. I was irritable, mean, sensitive, sad, and borderline insane. It was awful.
I'd read that one way to change a bad attitude is to focus on gratitude.
I'd just had my birthday so I decided to write out forty-six things I was thankful for. 
It didn't work.
My mood was the same, if not worse.
The thing is, sometimes there is no magic formula--no quick fix. Sometimes we just have to be where we are and invite God into it. It will take time, but He promises to ride it out with us. 

Thursday, April 12, 2012

Got Something to Talk About

Evangeline tagged me for this meme and as I haven't done a meme in a while and I haven't posted anything at all in a while, I decided to go for it.
It's just eleven questions. 

1. Book or movie and why?  

I just happen to be part of a book club that discusses a book and then watches the movie that was made from the book. Before this, I'd believed that the book was always better than the movie, but it turns out that it's about 50/50. Some movies are actually better. An example would be Jurassic Park. Although some would disagree with that. I felt like the movie condensed the story to what was important and added a character arc that was missing in the book.


Some books and movies are equally good, like The Princess Bride. And some books are clearly better than the movie, like The Big Sleep. The book actually makes sense and is wonderfully written. While I enjoy the movie, I never understood what was going on until I'd read the book.

2. Real book or e-book?



Both. I love my Kindle and read a lot of books on it. But sometimes I want to buy a book in it's paperly form. I do prefer the Kindle for library books when possible. They automatically disappear when the loan is over--no more late fees!


3. Funniest thing you've done in the last 5 years? 

Oh gosh. I don't think I've been very funny in the last five years. My friend Robbie and I spent a forty minute car ride talking country to each other. That was pretty funny.

4. How would your best friend describe you?

I have no idea! One of my best friends told me I'm very accepting. One told me I was wise. I'm pretty sure that silly or goofy would be on the list. 

5. Do you put yourself into the books you read/write or the movies you watch? 

I get pretty involved. Especially in movies.


6. Favorite kind of car and why?

I've always liked Jaguars. Because they're pretty and classy. 


7. Would your choice of party be a catered meal or barbecue out back? 

I like both. Sometimes I'm in a fancy sit-down-meal mood but other times I'd rather do the cook out. Either way, I want someone else to do the cooking, the serving,  and the cleaning. 

8. What's your favorite season and why?




Fall! I love the way the air feels. I love the way sound travels. I love the smells of dried leaves, spices, and pumpkins. I love the slant of the light. I love the first fire in the fireplace. I love cider. I love apples. I love Thanksgiving. I love the expectation of winter. I love everything about fall.

 9. What specific lesson have you learned - Spiritual, educational, occupational? 

I've learned that we are all more alike than different.

10. Besides writing, what's your favorite thing to do when you get some extra time? 

Paint. Read. Watch movies. Watch Star Trek. Watch Dr. Who. Facebook. 


11. What's one place you can be found at least one time every week?


Church

I'm supposed to tag eleven people, but I'm not going to. If you do it on your blog, let me know!


Thursday, April 5, 2012

What's Important

Often right before someone dies he utters the things that are most important to him. When a mom leaves her teens alone in the house, she repeats all the things she most wants them to remember.

What was important to Jesus? What did he want to be sure his disciples really understood before he left? During the last night with his disciples, Jesus tells us what's on his heart. From John 13-17:

~ Love one another. He says this three times.

~ Ask in my name, and I will do it. Six times.

~ Abide in me. Four times.

I think we tend to get off track. We expend so much energy doing things. Yes, he did give us the Great Commission as final words, too. But I see many of us putting so much energy into things that don't really fit any of these commands.

I think it's easy to forget what's important.

Sunday, April 1, 2012

Palm Sunday

morguefile.com
Today we think of the Triumphal Entry. But I wonder...was Jesus feeling triumphant?

In Luke's account in chapter nineteen, he tells us Jesus wept as He approached the city. Not a gentle, silent weeping. This was sobbing out loud. This was not a pretty cry. Jesus had a broken heart.

He knew that soon this city He loved would be shambles. Not one stone left on another because they had rejected the Corner Stone. He says the destruction would come because "you did not recognize the time of your visitation."

God was with them and they missed Him.

A pastor at our church said that one time he was asked to visualize himself at the Palm Sunday occurrences. To imagine what role he would play. He realized the bitter truth was that he would be off somewhere distracted by his own things and miss all of it.

I think that's true for so many of us.

This morning my prayer is that I will never miss God. When He shows up, I pray for eyes to see and a heart to recognize Him. When we miss Him, it breaks His heart.